Tacoma City Half Marathon 2015

One of the first thing you learn when you start training for distance running is 'run through the pain'. Not only is this how you will build strength, but it is also how make it to the finish line. Your legs and your lungs will burn and your body is telling you to stop, but you push and shut out that voice that is telling you to quit and before you know it you have made it. You are stronger. You are a little bit wiser. Most of all, you have accomplished something and it feels great. Running through the pain is different though when you have lost someone very close to you. You run to feel something other then the pain in your heart and to take your mind off your sadness. When you run you are in the moment, and in that moment you almost feel back to normal. The pain from running can become intoxicating if you let it. I found this out first hand back in March when my husband and I unexpectedly lost our six year old son, Patrick.

Patrick was an amazing person. He lit up every room and he made friends wherever he went. His smile was contagious and so was his laugh. He also had an amazing personality that was beyond his years. He loved listening to The Beatles and anything by John Lennon. Our song for his was Lennon's "Beautiful Boy". Patrick was born with an unknown genetic disorder, he was not able to walk or sit up on his own, he had limited movement, he had to be feed via G-tube, and he had daily seizures which he took medications for. My husband and I wouldn't know what Patrick had to go up against until he was born, but we did everything in our power to make sure he lived his life to the fullest. He was also why I started running. I figured if Patrick could go through everything he had to on a daily basis, I could finish a marathon. He would be there for every one of my races, cheering me on with his smile just like I was there to cheer for him.

I was never suppose to run this half marathon. My husband, Chris, signed up for it back in December of 2014 as an incentive to keep up with his running. At the time I was pregnant and planning on taking a break from racing. A month and a half later I had a miscarriage. I signed up for a 12k to help myself keep on track with my fitness with full intentions to leave the half marathon for my husband to run. To be honest, part of me was excited to cheer him on with Patrick at that finish line. The week after Patrick passed away changed my mindset. I needed running more than ever and my husband and I needed a goal to focus on together, so I signed up for the half marathon.

The morning of race day was beautiful and sunny. This is a point to point course, so we had my sister drop us off at the start area an hour and a half early. We watched the marathon runners take off, and during that hour we waited for our turn to start we warmed up and stretched and listened to the music on the PA system which just so happened to be a series of Beatles songs. It really felt like Patrick was there to cheer us on. We started our race and even though we were taking a slower pace, it felt like it was going by fast. Before we knew it we had passed the over the Tacoma Narrows Bridge and the three mile mark. As Chris and I passed each mile marker, we pushed each other and worked with each other. Even when the weather became warmer we worked harder because we knew Patrick was there for us. When we turned the corner after the seven mile mark we had a clear view of downtown Tacoma, where the finish line was. That is one of the best parts about running races in this area because you can focus on the finish being close at hand. I like to think of it as running the home stretch. The last five miles almost felt easy this time. I didn't feel tired and I didn't take a gel like I normally do. As we came up on the thirteenth mile marker we sprinted to the finish holding hands. All of the sudden we heard a group of people call out "we love you Chris and Laura!". Now, when you are focused on that finish line you have tunnel vision, so I didn't see who it was. I just though they read the our names off our bibs. As we crossed that finish line, the announcer gave us a special shout out saying that we ran the race in memory of or son. I started to cry and Chris hugged me. We weren't sure at the time how they knew why we ran this race, but it was nice. After we grabbed our medals and waters we found out Patrick's teachers were waiting for us. They had balloons, silly string and a banner, and they were the ones who cheered for us. They were also the ones who informed the announcer on the reason we ran the race. It was a wonderful surprise to have them there for us. They are a great group of ladies. After we said our goodbyes, Chris and I got our post race snack (pizza) we stopped to listen to the live band at was playing near the finish area. The song they were playing 'Hey Bulldog' by The Beatles. I like to think it was Patrick's way of telling us good job.

 Chris and I getting ready to start the race for our baby and son.

 

 Patrick's teachers waiting for us to cross the finish line.

 

 Chris at the finish line and his stats.

 

 Me at the finish line and my stats.

 



Post race selfie.

 

This race obviously had a lot meaning for Chris and I. Not only was it the first finish line we crossed with out our son there to great us, but it symbolized the journey that we are on together after losing him. We are there for each other in our grief as we were there for each other during the race. We miss our son more than anything and we wish we got to meet the baby we loss. It was a great honor to run in their memory.

 

Our next run will be the Sound to Narrows 12k on June 13th, 2015 in which we are also running in memory of Patrick and Baby. Our goal is to get a course PR of 1:10:00.

Santa Runs Tacoma 21k 2014

I have been putting off writing this blog post, mostly because talking about this race brings up some painful things that happened weeks after the race. Although a few months have passed my memory and feelings of the weeks before and after this race are still clear.

With every race I always do my best to take away a lesson, something that I can carry with me to use to better my self. I originally trained for this race with a big goal to run it under two hours which would have put me at a twelve minute PR. I trained and worked hard to achieve this goal. Then two weeks before the race I found out some life changing news and so I willingly let go of my goal. I was now running this half marathon just to finish.

Race day was a mild December morning, really a great winter day for running. I remember feeling no butterflies before the start of the race. Just a sense of ease like how I feel during a training run. Most likely because there was no pressure on me to preform. I was feeling good and that feeling would stay with me through out the race. When I filed behind the start I hung out towards the back of the pack and I would stay back there for the first two miles. As I was approaching the third mile I started picking up the pace. I was feeling good and running at a comfortable pace and by mile five I was behind the 2:10 pacer. At this point I realized that I needed to slow down. I am so use to pushing myself during races and under normal circumstances I would have pushed harder to get a PR, so forcing myself to slow down actually was a challenge. I would hold a slow and steady pace for the rest of the race taking a few walking breaks along the way.

 My beautiful boy and my best cheerleader.

 

 My husband and my best source of support.

 

 Hanging out before the start.

 

 I found the finish line!

 

 My finish time. I actually did better than I thought.

 

 My son and I.

 

 My bling.

 

 

My official time was 2:24:46, really a lot better than I had expected. My reason for taking things slow was because I was five weeks pregnant at the time. I had already spent the past few months training for this race and with my personal training knowledge I knew that baby and I could complete this race safely and we did. 

 

Like I said earlier, I do my best to have a take away lesson for each race. And I have to admit I really had a hard time finding one. After doing some thinking, and trust me I've had four months to think it through I feel that my lesson was it's okay to shelve a goal for later. I know that someday I can always go back to my sub two hour half marathon goal.

 

Now I also said at the beginning that this blog that the events after the race was difficult for me to write about. Even though what happened had nothing to do with running or the race, I still feel like I need to include it into is blog post. A little over a month after running this race my husband and I found out that we my be losing the baby. After three weeks of hoping and praying I miscarried. Losing a baby is such a hard subject to talk about and because I ran this race pregnant I felt like I couldn't write and post this blog right away. The day after we were told we were going to lose the baby, I signed up for a race that means a lot to me. I signed up for the Sound To Narrows 12k on June 13th, 2015. This was my first race back in 2012 and I knew I needed something to train for. I made the goal to finish in 1:10:00 giving me a ten minute PR.

 

Last month, my husband and I unexpectedly lost our beautiful son. He was born with special needs and he had been through a lot in his short life but he always had a smile on his face. He would draw people to him with his smile and his wonderful personality. He is the reason I became a runner and he also was my main cheerleader. Seeing his big smile at the end of a race would become an incentive to make it to the finish line when the going got tough. In his memory my husband and I will be running the Tacoma City Half Marathon on May 3rd, 2015. I know it's not going to be an easy finish line to cross, but I know he'll still be cheering me on.